Today, our beloved Administrator was expecting some important guests, a business party led by Mr.Mann himself, so in case he wanted to tour the facilities, we were asked to trim our toe nails and refrain from using the bathrooms. Not working was fun, but we had to wait standing with our newly washed and ironed uniforms, without creasing them. Finally, there was a hush and the Administrator rushed in to our Barracks alone, walked over to me and mumbled something about making a lot of money from apples, and that I was to build new weapons to be unveiled as part of some kick off event.

Interesting, I just realized that we never had a single actual apple in our compound, and that I only saw them on TV.

Anyway, I headed back to my workshop. I had so many ideas, because I have been doing a lot of thinking lately. I have been doing a lot of thinking lately because I had a lot of time while mechanically wrenching sentries like a robot. Then it occurred to me, heck, I am an engineer, and I solve practical problems. And there, keeping sentries alive was a mundane task which I should be relieved off.

I recently was assigned an engineering intern, he was from Europe or something, but I don’t know what became of him, maybe the Administrator set him up to participate in target practice, you know, as a target. So I had to build my own assistant.

The Nurse

Oh she is a beauty. And a doll. Always swinging the wrench, relentlessly.

She also dispenses health, ammo and metal. You know what, I tried something new and made her completely mechanical – no electronics. That means she is not sappable – eat that you back stabbing lizards! On the downside she can not be fixed in the field, really. Oh and she is a bit slow, you know, she can fix a sentry when a random pyro decides to attack, or when a traitorous snake pulls a sap-by, but she can’t handle a coordinated attack.

This baby can not multitask as well, it either dispenses OR repairs. Some of the folks on my team may have no honor or ethics, but I am an exception. I managed to mechanically build in the prime directive, so the Nurse will switch to healing whenever a human comes nearby. She has healing hands. Robot hands. Cold, metal fingers that deliver healing.

Some of the guys said that this fingery healing leaves them feeling somewhat violated, but I say to them “go suck on a medkit if you don’t like my robot”.

Rejuvenation at the expense of being touched inappropriately. But such is life.*

Here is what I am going to put down on my slide presentation for the Administrator.

• replaces dispenser
• mainly used to babysit sentries
• repairs other buildings, and is also a level 1 or slower dispenser
• can heal/repair ONE person/building at a time
• her prime directive prioritizes healing humans over fixing machines, so it stops repairing when a player is nearby
• can NOT be sapped or repaired
• she looks like the maid robot from Jetsons, and she gropes players as she heals them

————————————-

Well, what else? Let’s revisit the sentry, shall we? Ah, she is one my masterpieces. A symbol of accuracy and versatility. For she pounces targets with fierce precision, whether she is deployed on offense, on defense, on your front lawn or in your glove compartment.

Maybe I should think outside the box for this one – how about something inaccurate, and not versatile?

The Cannon

Because bullets don’t pierce ubercharges. But explosions send them flying up. This baby shoots cannon balls in an arc that are more or less aimed at enemy’s feet.

I built this darling using a special armor I casted by melting scrap demoman targes. Take that, overconfident pyros, soldiers and demomen!

Of course there are some issues with this new material, it takes a lot of resources to build, re arm and repair this cannon. It moves slowly and fires slowly. I remember once testing this thing during one of our drills. An enemy scout came in front of the gun – didn’t notice me or the cannon – knelt down, tied his shoes and went off… BEFORE THE CANNON COULD FIRE. Well, really, I see this more as a defensive compliment to the sentry gun. The cannon sends them flying, the sentry pins them mid air.

Here is a picture of an early prototype I was testing with that intern I mentioned.

A recap of my major points for those of you mentally challenged:

• replaces sentry gun
• shoots cannon balls, in an arc, at enemy feet, with moderate damage.  Imagine a sticky bomb launching sentry, with stickies exploding on contact with ground, or flesh.
• the explosive effect can propel enemies flying up, which may help defend against ubercharges
• very slow turn and firing speed, which means is less effective against faster classes and in close range
• has armor made of whatever demoman’s targe is made of; resists explosive and fire damage
• has huge metal cost to build, and is not upgradable

———————————————-

Okay, okay. Now something for the teleporter. Teleporter is an innovation in quantum physics, and you blokeheads do not come near even under-appreciating it.  ”Need a teleporter here.” As if it grew on trees. Sigh.

Have you ever fought on Granary? Badlands? Any place where spawn rooms move back and forth as capture points change hands? Building a teleporter becomes futile and I end up running back and forth with a toolbox in hand. I am sure you think that it looks funny. And I will make sure that if you find it funny, you will suffer for it.

But back to quantum physics.  An entry and exit point fixed in space is required to move people safely at relatively sublight speeds. But if we were to drop our safety requirements, I could just build something to throw people at sublight speeds towards a location that is within a certain probabilistic distance from an exit “beacon” :

The Sublight Sling

This is a sling. There is an entry pad, just like a teleporter, and it throws you to my vicinity at a sub light speed. Sounds easy, right? No it’s not. I have to carry a highly radioactive beacon under my hat. But it works. Oh the things I have endure for you. My piss has turned indigo since I started working on this, I mean, I did not know bodily fluids could come out in such fancy colors. Except for demoman’s blood. It’s more like alcohol diluted with a bit of blood. Think of orange juice, but more putrid.

A case of raining men, I say, Hallelujah.

Here is what it comes down to, folks:

• replaces teleporter (you don’t say?)
• only an entrance is built, an exit is not required
• “throws” users to my location, wherever I am, useful or not
• works like a level 1 teleporter or slower
• sling is inactive while I am waiting for respawn

I will kindly ask you to knock before using the sling, however.

Can’t I get a moment’s piece, goddammit? And close the door!

*thanks to Kitalpha for the groping robot idea

Indulge me dear reader; just the other day I was playing a game of Team Fortress Two with my good companion Sir Tygrys when an observation was made. Checking the scoreboards, one notices that many of you are sporting digital avatars that are ill-fitting for such a Gentle Manne’s game.

Now perhaps you can get away with this shameful display on other counties of the Internet, but this is Ubercharged; my companion and I agreed we must do something about it.

And so Sir Tygrys, being a master of the arts, began work producing a collection of Team Fortress 2 inspired portraits tailored for Gentle Menne with an eye for the latest in style. Before presentation I must insist that neither of us will be held responsible if, upon glancing these works of art, your monocle falls into your tea.

But without further ado allow me to present to you our works, complete with the accompanying press release from the newly formed T&T Industries:

T&T Industries is happy to announce the release of our very own avatar pack, more precisely the ‘T&T Industries Classy Classes Avatar Pack’.

This pack was specially designed for all of you who understand the need to be classy in all your digital ventures. This splendid pack comes in two styles: BLU and RED, to suit individual customer preferences. You will find that they have been readily scaled down to 184×184 pixels, so they are immediately ready to use on Steam the very moment you download them to your drive.

All of these spiffing avatars were made by two masters of fine art – Sir Tygrys Murdock and Sir Tesla Sherbonk, with extra thanks to Sir Dont for improving the quality of the original images. Should you encounter either of them during your exploits in digital space, be sure to bid them thanks; they’ll be ecstatic to hear their work is appreciated.

Now go ahead and enjoy this fine art as we have prepared for you.

Remember our motto – quality is of the utmost importance and we strive to satisfy all of our customers.

Signed: T&T Industries Chairman of marketing

Willbur McTrackingster

You can download the newly improved v2 pack HERE, thanks to our friend Dont. You may also wish peruse the full sized imagery whilst you await the cheeseboard. Lastly, to those of you whom have no interest in showing some class, may I perchance interest you in a job sweeping out my chimney?

As you’ve all been told thousands of times, this game requires good teamwork if you want to ensure victory for yourself. Some of you might think of teamwork as just running to your teammate’s aid and helping him take out that pyro, or chasing off that pesky scout, or healing him when he’s been clogged up with bullets. There’s more to it than that. It’s the small things that you do that can save time and frustration and lead to better teamwork and victory. When we ignore our team and fail to help them, our victory becomes captured like our control points. Here’s a few tips on what small things you can do to help your teammates:

Self Spy-Checking
Most people out there like to spycheck everyone they meet, mostly Engineers and Snipers. It’s an important tactic that people use to keep themselves and others safe from spies. Make your teammate’s life easier and spy-check yourself for them. That Heavy-Medic pair won’t have to stop and waste time checking you. That Pyro won’t have to run after you to check you. Best of all, your team won’t have to waste their ammo on nothing. Show that you really are on their side. Shoot the floor. Swing your melee weapon over and over. Or if you’re feeling jolly, taunt. Last time I checked, spies can’t do that. By doing this, your team has one less person to check and more time to upgrade that sentry or push forward and capture that point! This is especially useful for lowering the stress for Engineers. Upon approaching their sentry nest, you should always expose yourself as a teammate so that they won’t have to run at you with their wrench and waste time spy-checking you when there might be a real spy around or when they could be upgrading their buildings. Same deal with Snipers, although it might not matter because half the time they’re too busy looking in their scopes to even notice you walk past. Silly Snipers…

Run Towards Your Medic
Well, you just got injured real bad. Who ya’ gonna’ call? The Medic of course. But don’t expect your wonderful doctor to instamatically, automagically pop up right in front of you and hook you up. No sir! When you call for a Medic, save him the extra walk and calmly run up to him. There’s no sense in having your Medic run out into the open and put himself in danger of death by some sniper or scout. Remember, one less Medic means more pain for your team. Oh, and if you get to the Medic, don’t be one of those stupid people who runs circles around him and dies because the doc couldn’t get a fix on you.

Welcoming The New
Face it. It’s happened to us all at least once and will happen again sometime soon. A person new to TF2 joins your team and they’re doing a seriously crap job. They’re dying left and right, wasting ubers, the usual. Do you tell them to GTFO and uninstall the game? Do you tell them to ALT+f4 for free hats? Certainly not. The last thing you’d want to do is to discourage someone from becoming better at a game they seemingly enjoy. We all know the saying “practice makes perfect”, so it’s better to help a new person out then to ridicule them about how much they suck. Why, we all sucked when we first played TF2. And just how did we get so much better? We learned from our mistakes and other players. The next time you see a newbie on your team failing miserably, offer him a few helpful points such as:
• Don’t W+M1.
• Always check for spies.
• Don’t mindlessly charge out into the open.
• Shoot the ground near the enemy as a soldier.
• You can’t use the flamethrower underwater.
• A scout capping a point counts as two players.
You know, normal, everyday things that most players know. Although some may need to get used to the game, others are fast learners and can quickly become a good addition to your team.

Inform Your Team of Their Surroundings
It’s obvious isn’t it? It’s very helpful to inform your teammates of what’s going on around them, whether it be pointing out a spy, notifying your team of a well hidden sniper, or just advising there’s a pyro right around the corner. Telling your Medic with a ready ubercharge that there’s a spy behind him ready to stab will prevent a large amount of frustration. It means a great deal to engineers when you inform them what spies are disguised as and if they’re heading towards them or not. All it takes is simply yelling into your mic or quickly typing up a message in chat. Go with the sure thing. Watch your team’s back, and they’ll watch yours.

Just a couple of these small things can be very helpful to you and your team. Remember them, and a swell victory will be shared between you and your team.

Special Thanks to Tygrys for the gmod pics.

Yesterday, 8:30 am. We were already done with out group drills and were onto individual exercises. There I was, trying to maintain a decent sentry, under suppressive fire. But that was not the goal of the exercise.

You see, each of us has to be trained to react, to certain situations, in the blink of an eye. All this sustained fire was for distracting me from the focus, the climax of the exercise: the sentry exit.

A time comes in a sentries life when little balls with sticky spiky ends begin accumulating under its steel legs. One sticky, two sticky – you are too late!  A good engineer does not count stickies but abandons ship and jumps away as soon as possible. That was what I was being conditioned with.

Others get their own exercises. For example that ape, Heavy, has to keep moving and dodging without thinking. Oh wait, he does not think usually. So his exercises makes him think AND dodge.

He has to play chess, against a chess robot *ahem* I designed. Out in the open with several snipers trying to put an arrow into his big but mushy head. Oh and he has to carry a drunk Demoman, who has to be taken to the bathroom every so often – or he will relieve himself atop Heavy, who has to beat the chess robot and keep that alcohol drenched (did I mention also flammable?) Scot alive. You will notice the automated chess player is made up of body parts belonging to a former employee of ours. A former employee who was “check mated”.

Then, Pyro, that freak has it easy. She’s told that one of our spawn rooms is infested with butterflies and she has to stay in there until she torches them all. In reality there are no butterflies, her goggles are so dirty that anywhere she looks she sees little random dots around her. She goes on for hours before her gas and her battery dies out. The Administrator thought of this unique exercise to wear her out, or else that hyperactive wacko won’t let anyone sleep during the mandatory afternoon recess (once she mumbled the first two seconds of TF2 theme over and over for two hours!). Of course our beloved and resourceful Administrator would not let go of all that gas and physical enthusiasm.

The “Butterfly Room”, shortly after its inception, became a conditioning training ground for Spy. He has to stay cloaked, and, do I really need to say, unlit, until “all the butterflies are cleared” (in Pyro’s head, they may be, quite literally). Of course that would be too easy. He also has to listen to and memorize the “Shakespeariclesean Play of the Day” on the radio (his watch can pick up AM radio stations, I swear, it’s true!). Then he has to re-enact flawlessly the whole play for us and the Administrator, in the cafeteria before lunch is served. One slip of the tongue, he gets a lashing, and his meal is given to Heavy (who still eats the plates and the silverware out of hunger anyway).

Ah yes, what was I saying? Oh yes, the sentry exit yesterday. I was fixing my sentry. My senses were keen, my eyes sharp. There came the first sticky. My cue to dash out. But I could not get out in time.

See, ever since last Saturday’s Cafeteria update (which is an internal update, you would not  know), the quality of food drastically increased, with fewer poisonings and reduced occurrence of bloody diarrhoea. I have been told that my figure was getting a bit rounder and softer. So there I was, short of breath, trying to get my chubby buttocks over the dispenser. I got fat! Ah, big time fail.

I am a practical man. Not a muscle man. I am not going to the gym (it smells anyway). I shall have my food, AND my exit. I have been thinking since yesterday and I thought I would share my solution with you.

First I wanted to design a spring board that would eject me up, and away. But obviously flying and falling on a full tummy is neither fun nor a pleasant sight. Then I came up with a fun idea; my own little air compressor gun!

It kind of works like Pyro’s airblast, but more precise. Imagine a thin stream of compressed air. No? Then imagine relieving your bowels through a thin, long pipe. Fun, right?

From early field trials, I can happily say that it can push stickies far far away, and reflect rockets and arrows alike. It is a bit too precise to push back people or put out flames, but that was not the point anyway. Oh and I added a kicker – an air horn! When my tank is full of compressed air I can let it out through the horn and WHHAAAA? Everyone around me is startled. Some jump up, turn around in sudden excitement, or twitch and fire their weapons. I have seen heavies revving up their guns nervously, demos blowing up their stickies prematurely, and spies uncloaking accidentally.

I am not sure if the Administrator is going let me keep it. If worst comes to worst I will be assigned “Officer for Bathroom Hygiene” for a month. Not as bad as “Manager of TP Recycling”, the title Scout held for 11 months, for “portraying the Administrator in negative light via spoken language”.

Alas, there is a price to pay for every single thing that is fun.

And such is life.

The Engineer is possibly the most misunderstood class in Team Fortress 2, and that’s saying a lot when people still claim that there’s not such thing as a skilled Pyro or a useful Sniper. But while people generally know what each class does and the different kinds of play styles for each, people’s usual interpretation of an Engineer’s play style is “Build sentry, build dispenser, ensure neither dies while the sentry guards an objective” and that skill is only down to how well they deal with Spies and how well they place their sentry. And so the Engineer is generally regarded as just something you have on defence to stop Scouts from capping everything.

Some of the more enlightened will recognise two Engineer play styles, the second being that of the offensive Engineer- an Engineer who goes around building ambush sentries to confuse, delay, and weaken the enemy.

However, while these are the two extremes of Engineer playing, they are not the only way to play the class. How you do that, as the Engineer would say, falls within the purview of your conundrums of philosophy.

As is rather heavily implied by the title, there are four basic ways to play the Engineer, although each has variations, and there are a few Engineer players who don’t fit any of those four groups. Each play style is based on a different interpretation of what the Engineer is useful for. The Turtle Engineer, The Pod Engineer, The Aggressive Engineer, and The Offensive Engineer. The first one we’ll cover is the famous Turtle Engineer, the original play style of Engineers and still the most common, especially on attack/defend maps like Dustbowl.

The Turtle Engineer

Building of Choice: Level 3 Sentry
Weapon of Choice: Wrench
Personal Philosophy: “You don’t cap a point covered by a level 3 sentry, and a level 3 stops momentum pronto.”

The basic strategy of the Turtle Engineer is, as covered above, “Build a sentry and dispenser, upgrade them, keep them alive.” While it’s simple, it’s hard to argue that a defence isn’t stronger with a level 3 sentry guarding the objective or an important chokepoint, and if the team helps out by guarding the sentry from Spies and Demomen, it can form the cornerstone of a powerful defence. This is also the type of Engineer that benefits most from other Engineers- two sentries can cover each other’s weaknesses, and even a good Spy will have a bit of trouble dealing with two Engineers at once with sentries covering each other- stab and sap won’t work as well, and they can split up with one unsapping while the other attacks him.

Additionally, the more Engineers there are, the more sentries there are, adding knock back to ubers and killing people in the range faster, and the more dispensers there are, meaning that if a sentry is destroyed the Engineers can work together to quickly get a new one built and upgraded using metal from the surviving dispensers.

However, while this remains the most popular style for a reason, it is not without its faults. The Turtle Engineer can be cleared out by an ubered Demoman without a lot of effort, and in most cases it will take a long time to set up a new base- the Turtle Engineer is by far the slowest to set up of all the types of Engineers, and so suffers in fast paced games. Additionally, on any map where the team’s objective is something more than just defend, Turtle Engineering leads to stalemates and while it stops your enemy from winning, it doesn’t help your team win. In many maps, especially CTF, Turtle Engineering can also be very tedious, with long stretches of doing nothing but sitting and waiting for an enemy. If the team doesn’t help a Turtle Engineer, they’ll often get constantly overrun by people attacking their sentry from out of range, or a spy attacking at the same time as another player, an experience which can be very, very frustrating and rarely helps your team.

Because of these weaknesses, Turtle Engineers are a rare sight on most 5CP maps (except for the last point on Badlands), and almost never seen on Arena maps, due to the long set up time for their bases. The exception to this is Lumberyard, where a sentry can be built that covers the middle point without running directly into the enemy team. This type of Engineering is also arguably the easiest, since simply putting a sentry down on a point and hitting it can be effective. However, skilled Turtle Engineers will find excellent sentry spots and be able to build and more importantly re-build their bases rapidly to keep a constant obstacle for the attackers. And if you ever doubt the usefulness of a Turtle Engineer, have fun trying to take out a sentry farm.

So that wraps up the famous defensive-centred Turtle Engineer. Next time we’ll look at his polar opposite, The Offensive Engineer.

Hello there. You’re on a defensive team and picked the engineer eh?  Yeah it’s a great class for defence due to the sentry.

Looking good there

But honestly, while you’re standing there whacking the gun the whole round waiting for some action, let me tell you that there is more to the engineer than building stuff, WAY more. I am gonna teach you all about what you can potentially do with him. I tell you that once you’ve nailed everything here; you’re gonna see more points, your team will love you and most importantly, you’re gonna have much more fun with that class.
Keep in mind though that all information here is from how I look at the class (and not necessarily the best one). There are several different playstyles as engineer and I am just covering how i play this class.

The shotgun and the pistol:

Now before you start taking that buildomatic up, i want you to take a good look at your shotgun and your pistol. It may not seem like it at first look, but those 2 weapons are what that can make the engineer himself a big threat to the enemy if used right. Many players really underestimate the engineers own combat potential and get suprised when he is handing their asses back to them.

The shotgun is the weapon you should have up at all times when not engaged in combat, since you never know when there is an enemy coming right out of the corner. It’s your (obviously) best option in close combat and can really dish it out if you aim well. 3-5 well aimed shots is all that’s needed to take down any class. In addition it’s a good tool when sneaking up on a foe who is pressured by your teammates, get a few shots in and he is pretty much dead (in most cases).
One thing to understand though is that you should never reload the shotgun during combat. It takes far too long, your better off switching to your pistol and finish your opponent off with that weapon.

Speaking of the pistol, this thing of beauty is your best option at medium range, long range  and when your enemy is retreating. One full clip is usually enough to down any light class at medium range. 2 clips for the healthier classes minus the heavy. However you’re better off using it as a tool to wind down the enemy while you close in, pull out the shotgun, fire of the 6 shots, then get out and finish him off with the pistol (however, if the one you’re fighting is a soldier or a heavy, just stay away from them in that case unless your going in for a sneak kill).

Actually if you take a close look at the engineer, you realise that he is very similar to the scout. Minus the speed, extra jump and scattergun. The scout would obviously fare better than the engineer if your just going to use those 2 weapons. What the engie lacks in those areas however, he makes it up with his own personal computer contolled assist device of death.

Now we’re talking!

The sentry gun:

What makes the engineer unique is that he is the only class that can give the enemy 2 threats alone; the engineer himself and the sentry. As a key rule, always try to make your foe fight those 2 threats at the same time, since this will really pressure him. As for how to use the sentry, there are 3 different sentry strategies to use; ambushing, flanking (those 2 are also known as ninjaneering) and area denial.

Ambushing is done by hiding the sentry near a common route. Both a good offensive and defensive strategy. It’s all about waiting for the prey to come, jump in as soon as the sentry starts shooting and make him fight both you and your gun. In most cases you will end up as the victor, since the sentry have (hopefully) winded him down enough for you to finish him off with a couple of shots. This tactic is pretty dangerous if you’re far from your teammates however, since you’re pretty powerless if your enemy are coming in great numbers and/or a medic is accompanying him/them. Still, the nice thing about ambushing is that this is a good strategy to make sure your enemy is where you want him; stuck at one place and fully concentrated on your sentry. An opportunity to get in from behind and fire the shotgun point-blank.
Now, if you’re expecting slightly larger opposition while metal is in ambundance as well as having the time to do it, then you may want to upgrade your sentry to level 2 and have more firepower against the incoming forces. However in most cases this isn’t the scenario. I mean you’re better off switching your sentry position to keep your foes constantly guessing. As in, actually using that detonator and find another place to put down your sentry.
Pull that off and your enemy will look around evey corner due to fear off ninja sentries, way to go!

Is it there? Or isn’t it there? That is the question.

Flanking is different from ambushing in that you’re already engaged in combat togheter with your team. What you want to do here is to sneak around the enemy and erect a sentry up behind the enemy lines, facing your opponents directly while they are busy with your teammates. Very risky, but also very rewarding if you manage to do that. This will pretty much win the fight for your team as this will scatter your opponents, letting your teammates take them out easily.
This is also a game of chance though. You never know when an opponent might suddenly look at your direction and immediatly notify the rest of the team. Also the 5 seconds that takes to get the sentry up can feel excruciating while there is a huge rocket fight in front of you. It’s next to impossible to pull this off if this takes place in a enclosed area though.
Your sentry is very vulnerable when getting it out, one shot is pretty much enough to blow it up. In a situation where getting a sentry up can be the difference between winning or losing the battle, you should try using yourself as a meatshield while whacking it since your unable to repair it during setup time. 125 health may be little, but putting yourself in harms way could be the difference of getting the sentry up or not!

The moment when the blue players go “WTF?!”

Area denial is the most common engie strat that is used due to its ease to pull off and how tough it can be to break through it. While it’s generally a defensive one it can also be used offensively. It’s all about denying your opponent access to a area, limiting their mobility or downright refusing them access through a bottleneck.
Since your sentry is facing the oppostion directly (in most situations), your better off getting it up to level 3 as fast as you possible can to meet the incoming threat (when defending). Know where the metal is, always try to pick up scraps from dead opponents. If metal is short then get a dispenser up after the sentry and stay alive while you wait for enough metal.
However, this may not always be the best option. When whacking your sentry you should ask yourself questions like; “Should I get up there and help my teammates instead?”, “Maybe I should get more metal before continuing” and “Was that a spy that just passed me?”. Always analyse your situation. Maybe there are better things to do than getting a level 3 up fast.
Doing this offensively though is different, especially if it’s a normal CP map (as in not a attack/defend one). Trying to stay mobile and togheter with your team is your best option, since battle lines here can swiftly shift. Here you either want to get a sentry up in the middle of a firefight or near the front to give your team a safe spot as well as denying your enemy that particular area. Pulling the former off though is all about luck, but at least you’re giving the enemy a distraction/threat to take down when setting it up. Valuable seconds that your team can exploit to it’s fullest.
The latter is more favorable though, espeically if your team has a medic. The sentry can give the medic much needed cover for him (especially when against scouts) while healing retreating teammates, so that they can go back up and continue the fight. Kind of a “base” of some sorts.

Now here is a good spot

When finding a place to put down your sentry, it’s preffered you place it next to a wall facing away from it (as in the screenshot above). That way the sentry cannot be so easily dispatched from the rear. In addition the enemy you’re ambushing will be farther away from the corner/doorway he came from before the sentry engages him, meaning he will spend more time out in the open exposed to the sentry before he gets back.
Also lower and higher elevations are usually good places to hide your sentry as well, but whether they are good postions or not is map dependant. Oh and don’t be afraid to put it in the middle of an open field sometimes. It’s that place where the enemy least expects to find a sentry.

!!!

Working with other engineers:

Being among the most played classes of all in TF2, there is a high chance that you will encounter other fellow engineers. Particullary on the defending team in attack/defence maps and near your own base protecting the intel in CTF maps.
As a prime rule when working with more engineers; having a higher level sentry is better than having several small ones. This is because the firepower from a level 2/3 is better than 2/3 level 1’s, as well as being easier to maintain due to it’s larger health. So if you see that your engineer buddy have already started getting a sentry gun up, then make sure that you help him maintaining it and level it up to 3 before considering building your own. Also do not hesitate to help maintain allied buildings under attack or clear sappers from it. Your engineer buddy will thank you.
There are exceptions from that rule though.

If there is a place where the engineer population are drastically less, it’s out in the front line together with the assaulting team. However if you do see an engineer here then make sure you co-operate. 2 engineers working together are always better than 2 working alone.
While getting a high level sentry as fast as possible is the best solution for area denial, this isn’t always the case when ambushing or flanking.
When ambushing, you and your buddy should consider your options. Either you want to hide a high level sentry near a common route or you want to play mindgames with the opposition and hide 2 level 1’s instead in different areas. Neither of them is more favourable than the other, so analyse your situation and take the one you consider the best option to go with. However, if you did go with the latter and are still waiting for your opponent to come then by all means go ahead and upgrade one of them.
If your are going to flank, then level 2 and 3 simply isn’t an option. Time is a huge issue here and setting up 2 level 1’s is faster than a single level 2. Flanking is all about disturbing the enemy lines and scatter them, something that a level 1 does well enough. So here just work to get the first sentry up as fast as possible, then immediatly get the 2nd one up a few meters/several feets away. If the first sentry is under attack then don’t hesitate to jump back to the first and maintain it.

Also, when co-operating with engineers on normal CP maps, there is a chance your engineer buddy doesn’t want you to upgrade his sentry. The reason is that battle lines here constantly switch and he is planning on moving his sentry forward. Metal used on a sentry that is going to be detonated anyway is wasted metal. So if he is shouting the “no” command or telling you to stop upgrading it, then do that. Just work on your own sentry instead if your planning to defend the point.

Oh and by the way, do not under any circumstances build the sentries next to each other. You will just make it easier for the enemy to destroy them.

Teamwork is golden!

The rest:

One weapon i haven’t talked about yet is the wrench. Generally i prefer using the shotgun as i find the wrench not as reliable. However, if your opponent constantly try to get in your face and you feel like meleeing then go ahead.

The dispenser is a pretty situational tool in the engineers arsenal. Sometimes there is no use for it at all. Other times it’s the most crucial piece of hardware to set up, even before the sentry (very rare occasions!). But always remember that when setting up a dispenser, you do it for the team and almost never for yourself! You don’t need the dispenser right behind you when maintaining your sentry.  100-150 metal is usually enough to maintain the sentry for one attack because before you exhaust your resources, the enemy have either retreated, been killed or overpowered by your gun.

As mentioned the dispenser is situational, so deciding when to get one up or not, well that is up to you. However, there are some situations when you should really consider getting one up.

When capping or defending points. You usually don’t have much room to manoeuvre around when dodging bullets and explosives. Your options here are either A; continue capping/defending and take the hits or B; stop capping/defending and dodge the incoming bullets/rockets. In many occasions B isn’t an option. A dispenser on the point here would be a welcome relief for your teammates here, since they don’t need to abandon the point for health and/or ammo (usually). Yeah, I know it gets easily destroyed standing there in the middle of everything, but any seconds spent targeting the dispenser are seconds spent NOT aiming at the player capping/defending. In addition, the dispenser is a great way to get a player and particularly a heavy on the point as well.

Many times during a normal CP game, the 2 teams have created fronts and as such, the players will be fighting for every meter. During such fights they usually have to retreat for health.  Having a dispenser at the back supporting the team would certainly help them out and make them come back to the fight quicker, since the medic(s) can’t be everywhere and he usually has to join the assault for the big push. In addition medpacks/ammo isn’t always around when you need it. Either there are too few of them and/or too far behind.

Other situations when to consider a dispenser are:
(1) In arena (in most cases a must).
(2) When your team really REALLY needs health.
(3) When there is little metal in the surrounding area.
(4) To use as a platform, a shield and/or  a blockade.
(5) When your teammates are really pressured and can’t afford going back to heal/refill their weapons.

The teleporter is an important building when the frontline moves slowly. Getting your teammates up there faster can be what that’s needed to win the battle. This one is a must in attack/defence maps.
Also, it’s a very good flanking tool. Getting a teleporter exit behind the enemy lines gives your team another way to attack from.
Using it on normal CP maps though is a different story. The battle lines and the respawn rooms constantly switch all the time here and your just better off sticking to your team, your sentry and fight it out in the front. However always make a teleporter entrance when you have respawned. You never know when you need it. The exception here is during setup time. Since capping the middle point means you will be using your 2nd respawn rooms, then maybe you’re better off putting it near there than at start.
A rewarding way to use teleporters here is ninja capping. Hide a teleporter exit far behind the enemy lines, return back to your team (in most cases the enemy will spot you and blast you to bits, but hopefully you at least succeed at getting the exit up), get an entrance up nearby and continue the fight. Once it’s obvious that your team will get the point,  get enough metal for a sentry and warp in. Build the sentry close to the point and start capping. This is all about luck though as your enemy may already be there preparing their defences.

If the frontline really has stagnated, then getting a forward base may be the best option. This is having the sentry, dispenser and the teleporter together at a close proximity, where the sentry keeps the enemy off, where the teleporter gets teammates up to the front fast and where the dispenser lets teammates have a position to fall back and heal to, before getting back in the fight. The maps where you run into this kind of situation is on attack/defence maps and Hydro.
Don’t build them too close together though, this just makes it easier for spies to sap it and demomen to stickybomb it to bits.

D’oh!

When the situation looks hopeless and the enemy is going to blow your stuff up then don’t stand there, RETREAT! It’s better off to just run away and start over if it’s obvious that your building(s) is doomed. However if you want the last laugh, then detonate it before it gets destroyed. At least your opponent isn’t gonna get that point.

Always look around before placing the sentry and when getting it up. There is always a chance that an enemy might pop up and disturb you (especially a spy), so always look behind you between each whack. If your in a big open field and the enemy could come from every direction (or your paranoid), then circle around your sentry while whacking it or perform sentry gymnastics (constantly jumping over the gun while whacking, tough to pull off though).

And finally, it’s important that YOU stay alive, as you can always get a new sentry up in a few seconds if it gets destroyed. But there is nothing that can revive you and if you die, then there is a high chance that your equipment gets destroyed before you are back in action. Your life will always come before the sentry. The only exception is the one I mentioned on the flanking part.

Now of course, going against different classes in different situation require different reactions. But that will be for another time.

Credit to Toakal for the gmodded screenshots.

Tick, Tock,
Tick, Tock,
Tick, Tock…

Sometimes, when the time is ticking away, you get ideas. Sometimes, the idea is simple. Sometimes, it’s not…

Tick, Tock,
Tick, Tock…

Most of the time, however, time beats you. Most of the time…

Tick, Tock…

But sometimes…

Tick…

Just sometimes…

Tock…

Something awesome happens…

VICTORY! *Insert Fanfare here*

***

Yes, Spy/Ninja Caps. A technique? An art? An annoyance? Maybe a bit of all three. But deep in the fortress’ walls, in a book containing all lost skills, such as “Offensive Engineering” (Which has been restored as of late), and “Capping the Intel on 2Fort”, there is a section on Spy/Ninja Capping.

Now, there are three different techniques to Spy/Ninja capping. They all have their advantages and disadvantages. They are called “Prepared Capture” (The most popular one), “Over Offensive” and “Incomplete Cover“…

NOTE: This guide was designed for A/D maps only. Spy/Ninja Caps are more essential on those levels, as they can help in a stalemate posistion. In a Linier CP map, they are an annoyance to some players, especially the Prepared Capture. Of course, if a team has gone Over Offensive, or has a Incomplete Cover, they deserved to lose the final point, especially to an Engineer…

Prepared Capture

A Prepared Capture is when you wait for the capture point to be unlocked, and then, when it does, quickly capture the point. You can not do this on Payload, however.

+ Gives the enemy little time to react after the loss of the previous point.
+ Usually no enemy/Sentries around.
+ The easiest/most likely Spy/Ninja Cap to pull.

- As you wait, your team is down one man, which could be a major disadvantage.
- Boring while you wait.
- Sometimes, the enemy can see you on the cameras while they are dead (You know, when you are waiting to respawn, you can look through cameras overlooking capture points), and will hunt you down.

Dustbowl Example: Stage One, Capture Point 2

Although it can be done on any stage, a Prepared Capture can be done easily on Stage One, because it is possible that the attackers find little difficulty in capturing the first point. Hide near the point, so that people coming out of the spawn don’t see you. Once the first point is under your team’s control, get onto the second point and watch the swift capture commence.

Personally, I dislike this method. Every time I do it (Excluding the method explained near the end of the article, but even that sometimes fails), my team is unable to capture the first point. Especially on Stage Three of Dustbowl. Ever waited 20 minutes, hoping your team would actually capture the point? Zorgulon was not impressed when he saw me on the spectator cameras…

Over Offensive

This is when the enemy (The defenders) goes “Over Offensive”, which means that they push from the point to a part in the level. This means that you can easily cap the point while they are away.

+ The enemy is usually too busy fighting to protect the point.
+ Can work on most, if not all, levels (Even Payload).
+ The more your team is failing, the easier it is to do.

- Quite hard to sneak past the enemy.
- Respawned enemies will alert their team, and try their best to stop you while you were expecting an easy capture.
- If you fail, the enemy (usually) falls back and protects the point, preventing further Spy/Ninja Caps.

Dustbowl Example: Stage Three, Capture Point 2

The main battlefront of the area between the first and second point is the little alleyway in-between the points. Whoever owns that section has the attacking advantage. Of course, if the defenders have it, you can easily capture the point from right under their noses. If you can’t get behind them because they have a lot of people at the alley, go down the stairs, which should be an easy, enemy free path to the capture point.

Actually, I recently did this as a Pyro in a three vs four game on Dustbowl. Considering both my team mates were Spies, and were both dead while I was doing this (One died by taunt kill while I was doing this), I think I won this match by myself. I killed a KGB-weilding Heavy with two Flares (Loving the new Mini-Crit Flares BTW) and good old Axi’, and then took the stair route behind the capping Sniper, saw the Heavy crossing the bridge, and when the coast was clear, made my move. When I won, everyone but one person (Who was on my team) left. Ragequit much?

Incomplete Cover

When a Sentry guards the point, but doesn’t cover every corner of the point. Or, in Payload maps, the Sentry can not fire at you because the cart is defending you.

+ Can save your team if the Sentry has stopped all other attempts.
+ Always funny to hear people go “What just happened?”
+ Easy to do on Payload maps.

- Sometimes, an enemy will stop you.
- That Sentry will still be there after you cap the point.
- Harder to do when the enemy has multiple Sentries.

Dustbowl Example: Stage One, Capture Point 1

So the above may have confused you a bit, so listen to this example. So, one of the most popular Sentry locations for this Capture Point is on the stairs, yes? Well, most of the time, that Sentry doesn’t protect the entire point. If you enter from the entrance at the back, staying close to the left wall, and crouch onto the point, the Sentry usually isn’t able to see you there and you can cap the point with ease.

Last time I did this was as a Soldier, with French UC member Laharl (Self Proclaimed DJ of UC) as my Medic. Capped the point, and took down the Sentry with Splash Damage. He seemed to have been impressed with my fête. If you feel like being a team player, inform your team (Especially your Medic) what you are doing. I’ve had a Medic run onto the point while I was doing this…

Right into a Sentry…

***

Now when I say “Spy/Ninja Capping”, I don’t mean that this skill is limited to Spies. Any class can do this, be it Pyro or Sniper (As I have mentioned above). However, there are three classes I suggest to do this. So, without any delay, the classes used for Ninja Capping!

The Spy

The Spy is the most obvious choice for Spy Cappping. After all, it is named after him. When Spy Capping, the Spy can easily do all Spy Capping techniques. He can easily cloak and get behind the enemy to prepare to cap without noticing, in which he can prepare to cap when the point unlocks or capture the point if the defenders are on the offensive. The important thing to note is that, if an Engie builds a Sentry in case his team fails, the Spy can easily destroy it, while the below two classes will have difficultly. Oh, and the new Cloak and Dagger helps as well.

However, the Spy has his weak points. Once spotted, the average player will stand his ground and Spy Check the entire area. This is a problem if this area is near, or even on, the Capture Point. The other thing is that the average Spy can not get into a fight and win. Of course, I do not doubt your skill, but you may need to practice with your revolver/facestabs just in case. Or just pop the Dead Ringer up. Either works, really…

General Example: Pipeline (Stages One or Two, Final Push)

Since the Spy is so versatile at Spy Capping, it’s hard to give him a good example. So, I might as well give one for Pipeline, one of the newest maps. During the final push (The uphill ramps at the end of Stages One and Two), the enemy may choose to focus on defending the point, or pushing their cart. When the former is too weak, or distracted, then is your time to strike!

If there is no Sentries guarding the point, then uncloak or take off your disguise at the head of the payload. Since you don’t have to stay alive for long, all you have to worry about is the enemy running to stop the cart, rather then attacking from a distance. If you can push the cart up the hill, so it no longer falls backwards, then the chances of your team failing reduces so much (Unless the enemy has done the same to you)…

The Scout

The Scout, the fastest of the classes, can easily rush past the enemy and perfect for when the enemy is Over Offensive or have an Incomplete Cover, and can also be useful for a Prepared Capture. The Scout’s BONK! Energy Drink can allow you to safely rush past the enemy safely, at the cost of them catching up. Sometimes, you can use it to distract the enemy from the current objective, making them decide if they should go after you, or stay at the point, splitting up the defence.

However, like the Spy, the Scout has his weaknesses. After the effects of BONK!, the Scout is slow and still pistol-less. You’re only ranged weapon to stop the enemy from advancing is the Sandman, which you will most likely miss when you swing your ball. Oh, and if there is a Sentry ahead, you can kiss your Ninja Cap goodbye…

General Example: Gold Rush (Stage One, Capture Point 1)

The first Capture Point of Gold Rush is a perfect example to use Incomplete Cover to your advantage. The reason this is good for the Scout is he can push the cart twice as fast as the Spy. As the cart reaches the building (Home of one of the most obvious Sentry locations in TF2, along with behind the corner of Dustbowl 2-2 and the final point of Steel), hide to the side of the cart, so you can’t see the Sentry, and it can’t see you.

It’s a bit hard to pull off, due to the fact that enemies go through the tunnel and see you pushing the cart, but try it anyway. When the cart turns the corner, try to move so the cart still protects you. With a little bit of practice, you can easily cap the point without the Sentry even firing a shot…

The Engineer

Some of you fail to realize the effectiveness of an Engie Ninja Cap, and I respect that. After all, what does an Engie do? He builds a Sentry to defend the point right? Well, maybe he can use that Sentry to defend himself. You know, as he caps. You see what I did there?

Basically, our hardhatted friend can easily control a point before it opens, a “Prepared Capture”. The best part is, once he has a Level 3 Sentry controlling the Capture Point, it’s tough to get down. Most of the time, the enemy doesn’t even know it is there before it is too late (a.k.a. you are capping the point).

Mind you, the Engineer has very little tricks in getting behind the enemy. This is the reason Engies are hardly used for Ninja Caps, because it is so hard to get to the point and set a Sentry strong enough to stop enemies before the point is unlocked. Oh, and on some maps, placing a Sentry covering the point is countered as Spawn Camping…

General Example: Steel, Capture Point C

Well, you could try Gravelpit’s last point for the Engie, but usually the enemy finds you, due to the cameras and the beeps from a Sentry. You also need to set up a Dispenser, since there is no metal nearby. However, the third Capture Point on Steel is both ignored until it is unlocked AND near a large ammo crate. Get there by going through the last point (Either through B if A hasn’t been capped, or through A if it has). Simply put a Sentry in a position that covers the two ways the enemies go to defend the point, and put a Dispenser down so you can use it to heal yourself.

Many times have I caught the Capture Point this way. Sometimes, I do die, but at least the gates from B to C (Which take an awfully long time to open) open enough to let my team finish the job. However, if there is a Sentry at E, you may need to take a detour through D (And jump down onto the ledge or pipe connecting to the ledge). But usually, it isn’t a big deal…

***

Well, that’s the basics of Spy Capping for you. The art of being a Ninja is now yours. Now go, practice these techniques, and call yourself a true Ninja of Capping…

Now if I go onto Server 2 while it is on Steel and see a BLU Sentry Farm on C before A is capped, I won’t be happy. I’ve seen it happen before. Luckily, we managed to cap A and B when it did happen…

tl;dr version:

Don’t bother. If you don’t have the patience to read the article, you don’t have the patience to do a Prepared Capture. Don’t know what a Prepared Capture is? Exactly my point… :3

This is an article that’s been brewing for a long time. There’s a billion articles telling you to thank people on this site, and recently complaining about the unlocks has gotten a little absurd. Just look at all that fuss over the Sandman. There is one thing you need to know, and you need to know it now.

(credit to loafaries for the image)

What’s that? You’re helping your team? Well thank you for doing what you’re supposed to be doing.  There is nothing wrong with giving some thanks, but you know what? Valve did that FOR you. Everytime you take a teleporter, your character thanks the Engie. Every time you get healed, your character thanks the Medic. Bind “thanks” to a key all you want, but when you actually threaten to stop doing your job until a Soldier stands still, fumbles with his keyboard, and gets sniped every time you point your mouse in his direction, you need to stop being such a brat.

"Oh, hold on, let me just find my "thank you" key while this uber runs out."

Every member of your team is helping. Mr-Hyper-Sandman-Scout is helping by stopping people shooting at you and distracting the enemy. Mr-Kill-Streak-Soldier is helping your team by stopping you from getting overrun by enemies. Mr-Very-Paranoid-Pyro is helping keeping Spies away and causing fear and confusion in the enemies. Mr.Downright-Deranged-Demoman is stopping them from easily getting to key areas. Are you getting the point yet? Every class is helping out, not just the Medic and the Engineer. If you see yourself as some kind of martyr, playing a class just to help out and whining at your teammates for not being more vocally grateful, then you need to go play a class you DO enjoy. Some people actually genuinely enjoy Medic and Engineer.
The second this is a little more obvious- valve didn’t sell you this game as being updated and having cool new weapons fit in. None of the new weapons are so overpowered as to make it impossible to play without them. And if they’re “so awful” then go back to playing with the old ones! They haven’t “ruined” the Sniper, because you can still use all the old weapons. No one is forcing you to use Jarate, you whiners.

So yes, thanking people is nice. It’s  polite thing to do, and reflects that if you only cared about yourself you’d be doing something that’s better for your points. But it is NOT mandatory, and you should NEVER punish people for not doing it, because they’re helping too. And while it’s okay to point out whether you like or dislike something Valve has done, remember that they’re doing this all out of the kindness of their hearts, and they DO listen to the fans.

And honestly, who doesn't love Jarate. You're never too old for a good urine joke.

Most of the veteran Team Fortress 2 players miss the “Good old days.” The days without unlocks, the days without the Demoman nerfs, and soon, the days before hats. I’m by no means a veteran TF2 player, but I’m already missing those days. Specifically, one part of those days in particular.

I miss the lack of Medics

That’s right. I miss the days where I sometimes toyed with the idea of changing my name to “The Lone Medic.” In those days, I had to heal the entire team. It was crazy and hectic, but I loved it. I loved popping that Uber and watching my team swarm after me and my glowing pet Heavy. It was stressful, but it was the kind of stress that makes you a better person. Back in those days, I was topping scoreboards all over the server, but the real reward was the little “Thanks” voice command my grateful patients would always flash when I healed them.

All right, that was a complete lie. I liked the points more because they made me feel competent.

Of course, I couldn’t heal everyone. There was always the annoying flaming Scout who ran around me faster then I could get a lock on him. There was always the wounded Heavy who fell to a crit rocket. I wasn’t the Ubermensch, but I was alright.

But then something happened to a good friend of mine a few weeks ago. She got sick, very sick. The doctors said she might not make it. It was up to me to save her, even if it meant I had to give up ze Healing, ze Hurting, and hang up the Medigun for a Wrench or a Sandvich.

Team Balance got sick

It’s pretty common these days for me to hop on a server and find myself on a team of eight (including me) with two Spies, a Sniper, a Medic, two Scouts, and a Soldier. This is a problem for a career Medic like me. The only suitable healing target is being monopolized by the other Medic. This is the least of my team’s problems, however. And did I mention that the Spies are terrible and we’re supposed to defend Steel with this team makeup?

So I go Engineer, because a defending team needs at least one. I won’t be as effective as I would with a Medic, but hey, Engineer is credit is to team, right?

Oh wait, there’s a Spy on the other team, and he’s actually really good. Ten minutes into this steamroll, I quit.

It’s how most of my games are turning out these days, so I have a request—no, a plea. It’s to all the Team Fortress 2 players out there. When you join a team, please look at the other classes on your team and choose the class that your team doesn’t have. Even if you don’t like the class you’ll have to play. Being a Sniper can be fun, but sometimes you have to pick up that Rocket Launcher and take your Uber like a man, and who knows, you just might discover a new love for the class you play. Save the all-Sniper teams for shenanigan night, and everyone will thank you.

Author’s note: Loyal readers, (Have we known each other long enough, can I call you Loyal Readers, or is that too personal?) I know you must all be sick of these kinds of articles by now, but I guess the writing staff at Ubercharged.net has spring fever, and there are very few of us around, so you guys will have to take what you can get until the spring fever goes away.

Anyway, in eight months we’ll have had Team Fortress 2 in our game libraries for two years. That’s a big milestone. Two years of playing maps. Two years of updates. Two years of Demoman nerfs. We’ve had all this time to play Team Fortress 2, and observe the classes.

But what if the classes had the chance of observe us? What if they all knew they were in a video game? How would they react when exposed to Valve and the community?

Scout: I see the Scout taking the realization that he’s a video game character the best. He would get a huge ego boost over the fact that there were people playing as him all over the world. He would join the Steam forums and be annoyingly pro-sandman. Anything to give himself an edge.

Soldier: The Soldier would probably be disappointed in most Soldier players. He’d probably think anyone with less than a thirty kill streak unworthy of playing him. When introduced to the real world, he would find a job in management and whip some maggot department into shape.

Pyro: To quote the Pyro himself, “Mrph mrmm mm mp mrm mmmm!”

Demoman: Demoman would be very angry at Valve for nerfing him so much. He’d question the sensibility of nerfing the Demoman on the word of only the Steam forums. Then, finding that nobody was listening to him, he’d get drunk on the strongest booze he could find.

Heavy: Heavy would tell the Steam forum users to cry some more, then go join a real wrestling league and beat up puny babies untill he was fired for being too violent with his defeated enemies. After that, he would probably join the military. Heavy would love all those fancy new automatic weapons.

Engineer: Engineer would be one of the most unaffected by the revalation. In fact, I see him going to work for Valve. The image of him whacking away at the Half-Life episode 3 demo with his wrench is pretty funny. Maybe he’ll make it so you’ll get scurvy if you pirate it.

Medic: Medic would find no companionship with actual doctors. He would be severely disappointed with the lack of hurting within the medical practice. Perhaps he could get along with pediatricians. Most likely, he would follow Heavy into the army and revolutionize battlefield medicine with the ubercharge. Or many not, Team Fortress 2 tactics would never work in a real-life battle.

Sniper: Sick of being hated all the time, the Sniper would flee Team Fortress 2 and everything related to it. He could take up assassination and make millions, or maybe get his own reality show. “The Wankerdile Hunter.” I forsee big bucks no matter what career path the Sniper takes.

Spy: The Spy would probably be motified at this revalation. All his secret operations laid bare for the world to see. He would disappear into the real world, and no one would hear from him again… Or would they? Mysterious deaths and corporate takeovers abound.

The Announcer: Fools, she already knows. Most likely, every world leader is under the Announcer’s thumb somehow. She also runs Valve, Gabe Newell is her cofee-boy.

See you on the other side, friends.

If you have recently expierienced head truama and care about what Sheepshifter is doing these days, check out his twitter by copy and pasting the following address into your browser because he cannot figure out how to make links all fancy right now. https://twitter.com/Sheepshifter