Meet the Spy
It’s been a long time since I’ve written here, but I’ve recently uncovered something that must be shared.
We all remember the scout update, the breathless anticipation we had for not just new weapons and new achievements, but also for another of TF2’s “Meet the Team” trailers, that are miniature cinematic masterpieces in their own right. We wanted to meet the Spy and his trademark butterfly knife, we wanted to laugh at/with the Medic as he furiously shakes his fist at inattentive teammates, we wanted to finally find out just what the hell is under the Pyro’s mask. But alas, the Scout update came and we were disappointed. No mumbling and sizzling, no puff of cigarette smoke, no blood-stained gloves…
Or so we thought. Gentlemen and the occasional lady, I present to you this question. If Valve were to make a video of the Spy, a master of espionage and misdirection, would it be appropriate for them to simply give it to us? Should they just slap a link to it right in front of our faces and directly tell us, “This is the Spy”?
If it were the Pyro or the Medic, it would be different. But no, oh no, not for the Spy. With these suspicions in mind, I went to the newly-designed Team Fortress movie page. It made its debut around the Scout update’s time, and yet no new movie was included… coincidence? Maybe. I tried the obvious like http://www.teamfortress.com/spy.htm or 007.htm or even backstabbingcloakingbastard.htm
Nothing, but this was no big surprise. Valve wouldn’t make it this obvious. I went back to the old Orange Box site. I looked at the various TF2 fan-blogs. I even trawled TF2Chan of all places. Finally, just when I was about to give up… I found it. Ladies and gentlemen and everyone in between…
Stumble it!
Crazazazazy responded on 09 Apr 2009 at 9:22 am #
mother of god
Cowjuicer responded on 09 Apr 2009 at 9:32 am #
I was expecting a Rick Roll, honestly.
This… defied all possible expectations. What the FUCK was that?
I’m laughing my ass off and trying to figure out why it was funny.
GeneralGoose responded on 09 Apr 2009 at 9:34 am #
I hate you so much right now.
Corodan responded on 09 Apr 2009 at 9:39 am #
Saw this a long time ago.
STILL PISSED AT YOU WHEATLOAF.
Cowjuicer responded on 09 Apr 2009 at 9:40 am #
Gah, got a question: how do I set an avatar?
NotPigeon responded on 09 Apr 2009 at 9:45 am #
Oh god this again.
…I… I just…
WHAT I DON’T EVEN-
Kreme responded on 09 Apr 2009 at 9:52 am #
sweet mother of…
Ravelle responded on 09 Apr 2009 at 9:55 am #
The Sandwich is the spy
I also checked the source code, nothing that leads to a spy,pyro or medic page.
[22g]MrFlibble responded on 09 Apr 2009 at 10:03 am #
lol this is wrong on like 8 different levels
C.G. responded on 09 Apr 2009 at 10:13 am #
Dear Ryebread,
Please, do kindly move yourself to Hell, and remain there to burn for the rest of the eternity.
Sincerely,
Someone who needs to cleanse her eyes with bleach right now.
P.S. When are you finishing the epic TF2 tale? >:
Pulviriza responded on 09 Apr 2009 at 10:27 am #
Ah! Ah! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! Make it stop! The burning!
Zorgulon responded on 09 Apr 2009 at 10:36 am #
You’re a week late.
Kmria responded on 09 Apr 2009 at 10:38 am #
I’ll never see the Spy with the same eyes again. I BLEED!
NotPigeon responded on 09 Apr 2009 at 11:07 am #
Zorgulon’s avatar under Pulvizira’s post is great.
Anonymous responded on 09 Apr 2009 at 11:14 am #
Mein Gott…
FlyingHat responded on 09 Apr 2009 at 11:18 am #
I guess impaling my heart with my microphone didn’t help me escape.
Mr. Noobinator responded on 09 Apr 2009 at 11:19 am #
MY EYES!
MY FREAKING EYES!
THE PAIN!
CrabGuy responded on 09 Apr 2009 at 11:28 am #
Holy jesus.
im THAT spy responded on 09 Apr 2009 at 11:38 am #
You got vomit on your keyboard…
Jokerine responded on 09 Apr 2009 at 11:40 am #
Hahaha, I had watched that before. It scared the heck outta me the first time around, and now it wasn’t any different. I don’t think that animation originated from boredom. That is PURE EVIL.
I also almost went into seizures by the end of the clip. Dunno if it is because of the colors or because of the emotional trauma.
Sarda responded on 09 Apr 2009 at 11:52 am #
I’ve got preview set on tinyurl, so when I saw ‘homotime’ in the url I kind of expected something like this, but still…
DSFJFESOMCSVNLIR
HelisPoe responded on 09 Apr 2009 at 12:12 pm #
The Blu Engie has some weird preferences.
Wait… no…
The Red Spy has some weird preferences.
That video made me die multiple times with seizures.
The Black Watch responded on 09 Apr 2009 at 12:21 pm #
I proscribe Brain Bleach: http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/BrainBleach
BJ Blazkowicz responded on 09 Apr 2009 at 12:41 pm #
W.What.
Cowjuicer responded on 09 Apr 2009 at 12:58 pm #
I thought it was cool.
Connor responded on 09 Apr 2009 at 1:08 pm #
Saw it coming. not really, but I’m not surprised the spy would do that.
Connors responded on 09 Apr 2009 at 1:33 pm #
Jening was better.
Small Ivory Knight responded on 09 Apr 2009 at 2:07 pm #
Connors is right….
Sad Engie is Sad.
Anonymous responded on 09 Apr 2009 at 2:38 pm #
wtf…
Secret Agent Clank! responded on 09 Apr 2009 at 3:24 pm #
Uh-huh.
Cool animation. Can’t say it fazed me all that much, tbh.
*ponders about things that desensitized him*
@Cowjuicer: Why hello thar. Please visit gravatardotcom for all yer needs! (Come to think of it, somebody needs to put that down in some kind of FAQ somewhere.
Kollega responded on 09 Apr 2009 at 4:25 pm #
ZOMGWTFBBQ!!! My flesh! IT BURNS!!!
…
On second thought,looks like something Spy would actually do.
And when “RED team saves X-mas” is going to be finished?
Wes responded on 09 Apr 2009 at 4:41 pm #
HA! Lucky me that I only had to see “WHAT IS THIS” before I knew that it was that gay spy movie I saw back on Facepunch. He said ‘this movie is disturbing, but funny.’
Wes responded on 09 Apr 2009 at 4:42 pm #
So MY eyes get to stay in their fucking sockets!
Teridax responded on 09 Apr 2009 at 5:13 pm #
Oh my fabulous Train god…
Must.Wash.Eyes.With.Bleach.
Neuromante responded on 09 Apr 2009 at 5:31 pm #
Well, THANKS! I was looking for semthing funny to begin the day, and you brought it to me.
Cheers!
Mickyan responded on 09 Apr 2009 at 6:18 pm #
That burned.
For those who didn’t see this yet, you might want to check this out aswell
http://www.newgrounds.com/portal/view/481609
Josh responded on 09 Apr 2009 at 6:29 pm #
I can’t unsee what has just been seen!
Sum1 responded on 09 Apr 2009 at 10:55 pm #
What the…
How the…
Why would…
You… And…
What…
You…
And…
Just…
WHY!?
FrohmanForPrez responded on 10 Apr 2009 at 12:28 am #
EPIC WIN. Thanks for a brilliantly delivered laugh this morning.
Alex responded on 10 Apr 2009 at 6:45 am #
that was… obscure….
Anonymous responded on 10 Apr 2009 at 8:58 am #
old and crap
Stick responded on 10 Apr 2009 at 10:48 am #
I need to go kill myself. Others may die too.
TF2fan responded on 10 Apr 2009 at 12:47 pm #
@Connors and @SmallIvoryNight:
Yes. Jening was definitely better. You bumped him off the front page for this? =p
Ryebread responded on 10 Apr 2009 at 1:59 pm #
@C.G. and @Kollega:
Well, I was hoping that everyone had forgotten about it so I could wait until next Christmas and spring the conclusion as a surprise, but since people are still waiting, I’ll start work on it two weeks from
Busy with with exams and all, ya know.
@Everyone Else who was amused, horrified or just plain disappointed:
Yaranaika?
how did this get here responded on 11 Apr 2009 at 8:11 am #
Saw that one a while ago…
Still makes me laugh though.
Lord Grey responded on 11 Apr 2009 at 11:21 am #
RYEBREAD YOU DIRTY LITTLE WHORE!!!!!!!*sniff*
I then immediately proceed to retrieve a gallon of bleach and disinfectant
Ribonucleic responded on 11 Apr 2009 at 1:59 pm #
What the heck?
That was funny…and strange…
Dipshit responded on 15 Apr 2009 at 4:45 am #
But! But the spy video is right here!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ObKulsaHnj8
! xD
Confetti responded on 15 Apr 2009 at 1:01 pm #
Bleargh.
Why does TF2chan exist?????? D:
Alyssa responded on 17 Apr 2009 at 1:40 pm #
So this is totally my avatar on STEAM and dA xD
FoxMan Alpha responded on 17 May 2009 at 5:27 pm #
WHAT IS THIS I DON’T EVEN-
FoxMan Alpha responded on 17 May 2009 at 5:29 pm #
I thought that was actually quite funny. I just felt like quoting the title. :3
Jonus63 responded on 17 May 2009 at 7:56 pm #
dont you know the real meet the spy is leaked?
ubercharged.net - Meet the Spy is here! responded on 18 May 2009 at 5:33 am #
[...] real this time, I [...]
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