Players You Don’t Want On Your Team - The Groupies
First of all, I’m not an angry person. I’m the kind of guy that likes to make friends everywhere he goes. Recently, I’ve come into contact with a few groups of people that just leave a bad taste in my mouth. I know you’ve come across at least one of these groups when you’ve played. We have:
The Vaders
A group of people that, for some reason, don’t know that they have half their mic in their mouths or rammed deep into their nasal cavity. So all you hear is deep breathing and sometimes its so bad you can hear their stomach. Disgusting. Gross.
The Single Class Men
The group or people that only plays as one class. NEVER switching when it is needed because of the much said, “I already have like 80 hours with the (Insert class) so someone else can switch!”. Look gentlemen, the idea of the game is to win. NOT so improve your score for a class. I’m sorry, I could care less about how many hours you have as an Engie, Pyro, Heavy, etc. If we need something and you notice it. Help out and change. No point of a Sniper running down into the Intel room trying to fight off an Ubered Soldier. Help us, not yourself.
The Ninjaneer
The group I possibily hate the most. There are usually between 2 - 5 of these waste of spaces running around. Your out on the front lines wondering when them Engies are going to show up to the party. You go running back to see what’s up. You come to realize that they’re no where to be found.
Like ninjas. Just not as cool or deadly. All you see is a mess of Teleporter Entry Points. You walk into it, you know you shouldn’t of but its to late to turn back now. FLASH! You’re in a dark room (or under the map) with a bunch of morons having a Ho-down around their sentries and you can’t escape from the hell they’ve created.
Causing you to not only lose the game, but lose your cool. It was fun the 300 times. Not anymore, let us move on to something worth our time.
People that join one of these groups of people should just return the game and play something that they are use to like Ice Climbers or Superman 64. You are not TF2 material so stop ruining the game for the rest of us.
And another newbie ubercharger. Can’t go wrong with all the new talent - cheers. madlep
Arsenal IV on August 8th 2008 in community, funny, rants, team fortress 2
Stumble it!
FunkyB responded on 08 Aug 2008 at 8:15 pm #
I haven’t encountered glitching Engineers for months. Are there still any maps that you can do this on?
supremesonic responded on 08 Aug 2008 at 9:24 pm #
“…and you can’t escape from the hell they’ve created.”
You can. Switch classes to kill yourself, then switch back when you respawn. I get your point, though… I’m probably going to be writing more on this topic soon.
Xeno responded on 08 Aug 2008 at 10:53 pm #
They fixed the engineers, maybe there are some custom maps you can do it on still though.. I’ve only seen it happen once, right after badlands came out and it was more hilarious than anything, our team capped the point and just ran right past then. They didn’t get any kills whatsoever.
It was a pretty nice rant though, I lol’d at the Vaders bit.
Notger responded on 08 Aug 2008 at 11:30 pm #
Well, I have to confess, I am a single-class player. But hey, is there any given moment, where you would not need a 200h-Demoman?
I can’t think of any.
Pinko responded on 09 Aug 2008 at 1:42 am #
Notger: A Scout Jump map. Duuuuh. D:
Himmelstoss responded on 09 Aug 2008 at 4:27 am #
Worse than vaders are the squeakers (to steal the term from ctrl-alt-delete, i believe): the 13-year-olds who act like they’re 21 (even though their high-pitched voices give them away), pretend they’ve been laid, and swear incessantly to cover up their obvious lies.
Arsenal responded on 09 Aug 2008 at 8:40 am #
AH, squeakers was the one I was trying to remember. Little kids dropping the F-Bomb more times then I do getting facestabbed. There should be a button that when pressed, puts toothpicks under there big toe nails and makes them kick a slamming door. Wow….. sorry about that. Anger issues.
Mooman responded on 10 Aug 2008 at 9:30 pm #
Groupies aren’t mentioned once in the article. Due to this misinformation, I now have to rearrange my perception of reality to fit this fault in the wiring. The impossibility of seeing any information regarding groupies or followers despite the blatant advertisement of a whole article on the subject has boggled me, and I am stunned. Perhaps there are some techniques to amend the predicament I have been unwillingly placed in.
Indeed. Now, on to actually making a reply to the post. I’m lucky enough to have never encountered a glitching engi, I have however seen and suffered quite the opposite; glitching pyros destroying engi buildings by shooting through the floor. I’ve also encountered engies building sentries on ’surf maps’ in places that ruin the game for everyone else. This appears to be quite normal, I’m surpried the admins don’t just stop allowing sentry construction. I’ve seen it done before.
Vaders don’t really bother me too much, unless they make it totally impossible to hear what they’re saying. The really cool guys then yell at you (in equally indecipherable static) for not listening to them. Just last week I was yelled at by a vader, he seemed to stop speaking ‘Drunken Thaiwanese’ to ‘Martian with a mouthful of baby-batter’. Why? I was a RED spy on Dustbowl stage 1. BLU was using the ever recycled tactic of turning the long tunnel into an uber building nest. I went to backstab one of the medics who had just medic-scout combo’d a teammate at the non-gate end of the tunnel. Everything was perfect, then he turns around with mehalfway through the stab. He brings out the ubersaw and Lord Vader screams at me to run away. By the time I decide I need to run away, this guy ad already taken a swipe at me (of course sending Vader into a fit). I start walking backwards towards the exit and get trapped between a wall, the medic, a heavy who came through the first cap side and a soldier who was spamming the cap. The medic swiped me numerous times while the soldier starting shovelling me. I really couldn’t do anything other than swipe with the knife (the revolver actually doesn’t detect hits at point blank). I was apparently this guy’s long lost mother, as he was damn near crying as I got gangraeped. We lost the match via uberrush. I like to think that the medic that cut my to ribbons that day was on the same life when he ubered with his buddies, just so I know I annoyed that guy with the broken mic who seemed to care so much.
Some people just like to stick with one class. At first, I wanted to do this, but when I saw us horribly losing and nobody took the post of what we neede, I did. This happened so frequently that I actually stopped focussing on that class, as I’d had enough of a go with the other classes to make me want to improve and be good at it. Now I’m fairly good with most of the classes except Heavy. With some time I’ll be actually good at every class, instead of just really awesome with one.
500 words :/